A Dream Frozen

DJ_Veit

Genre: Emo

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Description

Written and performed by me. This was written for a friend whos going through a rough time. please rate it!

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Lyrics

The cold of Winter stings me
Before it makes me dream
The Dark Days Behind Me
Never Felt So Empty

Chorus:
And why won't you hold me
While I sew these holes
And Please Don't ask me
About the cold

You Dream on me
And it feels so cold
But why can't you answer
Why you left me consoled

Chorus:
And why won't you hold me
While I sew these holes
And Please Don't ask me
About the cold

Don't make me cope
With your loss of hope
I'm waiting for your answer
To my receeding cancer

Hold your ears to my chest
And listen for the beat
Hear as it dehastens
Until Silence be your treat

Chorus:
And why won't you hold me
While I sew these holes
And Please Don't ask me
About the cold

So when you get to heaven
Put a good word in for me
Because I want to be with you
Forever in safety

Chorus:
And why won't you hold me
While I sew these holes
And Please Don't ask me
About the cold

Song Stats

Hits: 1082
Comments: 7
Fans: 1
Plays: 287
Downloads: 62
Votes: 4
Uploaded: May 22, 2006 - 09:44:26 AM
Last Updated: May 22, 2006 - 10:24:22 AM Last Played: Oct 13, 2009 - 12:49:11 PM

Song License

Creative Commons License:
Attribution-NoDerivs-NonCommercial

Song Actions

Keywords:

emo (78), mellow (117), sad (148), melancholy (61)

Hardware:

indiana acoustic guitar, playstation 2 usb headset :), my voice coming from my hot body

Software:

garageband

Comments

jie	jie said 1284 days ago (May 22nd, 2006)
	cool haunting song, nice chord arrangement. nice playing. liked it. keep up good work, cheery Check out my latest song called Gods Got HisPlans, Ive got mine

DJ_Veit	DJ_Veit said 1284 days ago (May 22nd, 2006)
	cool nice adjective choice man thanks for listening Check out my latest song called Distant Dubs

caroline

caroline said 1284 days ago (May 22nd, 2006)

you wanted me to tell you what i think.....
well..... it did go on and on - shorter would've been nice
also.... i felt you missed some notes in as much as you didn't hit them
and... i wish i had heard more variation
but.... that being said....
you have a lovely voice and play nicely
let me know next time you upload - i will be interested to hear your work develop

remember - opinion is only subjective xox

and .... welcome to mj - if you enjoy it half as much as i do ... i will have enjoyed twice as much as you!!!!

Check out my latest song called clink that link mjrf

screamalexz

screamalexz said 1284 days ago (May 22nd, 2006)

hmm
i think the vocals seem a little loud in the mic, i like the haunting style. getting caroline to watch you develop is great, she was my main drive to getting my vocals better. i'd like to hear the chorus higher and filled with emotion i'd like to hear you change volume and notes to set the verses apart from the chorus a bit more. your style is one i enjoy, and will love to hear it get flushed out and fine tuned.

Check out my latest song called Die (Album Version)

Tiny_Man_Inside

Tiny_Man_Inside said 1282 days ago (May 24th, 2006)

hmmm
after talking to you in the chat, I was expecting some screamy-hardcore-mayhem and instead I hear a melancholy ballad. Your voice has a nice depth to it. I think the song has some good points, but you're using the same melody throughout, so there is little differentiation between the chorus and the verse parts. This makes the song seem longer than it is. I would try to mix up the guitar parts a little more to break up each section of the song. You've got the components of a good song here, you just need to do some editing to bring it all together. Nice first effort!

Mason

Check out my latest song called Left to Swing (w/ The Composer)

ElPeruano

ElPeruano said 700 days ago (December 27th, 2007)

nice
I agree with alot of the comments here already. Namely, this song has so much potential. I love the guitar riff and the lyrics. The haunting dissonance. The best line is "Until Silence be your treat" because of the distinct delivery.

With that said, more variation in the lyrics would do this song a great service. Also, a cleaner vocal production would help. Theres some pops with your harder consonents, a problem that can be solved either by practicing a gentler delivery on your p's and c's and the like or getting a pop filter to keep the rush of air from hitting the mic.\

Overall its a great song that a few adjustments would really bring out. keep it up!

Check out my latest song called Requiem (w/ TNTrio)

DJ_Veit	DJ_Veit said 648 days ago (February 17th, 2008)
	for sure yeah this one is REALLY old. i have improved greatly since then. i have a pop screen now and have upgraded my mic situation. i doubt ill ever come back to this song but i might. i mean WHO KNOES!! thanks for commenting. Check out my latest song called Distant Dubs

Fan List

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Artist Info

Name: Danny Veit

Names Danny and i hail from St. louis, Missouri - home of the arch... and not much else. I got into this stuff about 2 years back. I started using loops n stuff. Then I got a book and started to compose. I like it. I enjoy it. But most importantly,... [see more]

Check out some of my other songs:

Genre Info

Emo is a subgenre of hardcore punk music. Use of the term (and which musicians should be so classified) has been the subject of much debate. In its original incarnation, the term emo was used to describe the music of the mid-1980s DC scene and its as

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