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Description
Caroline was instrumental (ah hem) in this track coming about coz she was touting three sets of lyrics in a forum thread (which turned out to be by the insanely talented Comdotdom) and I agreed to write a tune for one them (Rubber Saxophone). I came up with a tune almost immediately however it must be pointed out that this was around August last year so it shows how long it takes me to actually realise something!
Anyway the esteemed Caroline provides the sultry smoky vocal, I did the tune and arrangement and that’s about it really…
Oh yes... originally Caroline was going to do the saxophone part on kazoo - but sadly her kazoo was at the mender's at the time I needed to do the recording so I'm afraid the track is not what it could be...
Anyway the esteemed Caroline provides the sultry smoky vocal, I did the tune and arrangement and that’s about it really…
Oh yes... originally Caroline was going to do the saxophone part on kazoo - but sadly her kazoo was at the mender's at the time I needed to do the recording so I'm afraid the track is not what it could be...
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Lyrics
Not exactly the lyrics which appear on the track as Caroline has made some choice amends:
Well, you got yourself a ten foot rubber saxophone
And you bought yourself another so it wouldn’t be alone
But you know, pretty baby, that it’s gonna end in tears
Coz you can’t play not saxophone when you ain’t got no ears!
Well I bought you a shiny silver trumpet
And you said it was the best one you could get
But you know, pretty baby, that it’s gonna do you harm
Coz you can’t play no trumpet when you ain’t got no arms!
Well, you went into the town babe to buy yourself a bed
And four large and fluffy pillows all brightly coloured red
But you know pretty baby that you’re gonna end up dead
Coz you can’t use no pillows when you ain’t got no head!
Well you went into the shopping mall to buy yourself a shirt
But the man bhind the counter, well he treated you like dirt
But you know pretty baby that they’ll treat you like a skunk
Coz you can’t get respected when you ain’t got no trunk!
Well you was hanging up your trousers on the washing line
And the sky was clear and sunny – baby, you was feelin’ fine
But you know, pretty baby, that you just can’t use those pegs
And you can’t dry no trousers when you ain’t got no legs!
You know I couldn’t write this sober – I had to get quite pissed
But I couldn’t help the feeling there was something I had missed
Then I reasoned my problem and the difficulty’s this
That you can’t write no love song when you lover don’t exist!
Well, you got yourself a ten foot rubber saxophone
And you bought yourself another so it wouldn’t be alone
But you know, pretty baby, that it’s gonna end in tears
Coz you can’t play not saxophone when you ain’t got no ears!
Well I bought you a shiny silver trumpet
And you said it was the best one you could get
But you know, pretty baby, that it’s gonna do you harm
Coz you can’t play no trumpet when you ain’t got no arms!
Well, you went into the town babe to buy yourself a bed
And four large and fluffy pillows all brightly coloured red
But you know pretty baby that you’re gonna end up dead
Coz you can’t use no pillows when you ain’t got no head!
Well you went into the shopping mall to buy yourself a shirt
But the man bhind the counter, well he treated you like dirt
But you know pretty baby that they’ll treat you like a skunk
Coz you can’t get respected when you ain’t got no trunk!
Well you was hanging up your trousers on the washing line
And the sky was clear and sunny – baby, you was feelin’ fine
But you know, pretty baby, that you just can’t use those pegs
And you can’t dry no trousers when you ain’t got no legs!
You know I couldn’t write this sober – I had to get quite pissed
But I couldn’t help the feeling there was something I had missed
Then I reasoned my problem and the difficulty’s this
That you can’t write no love song when you lover don’t exist!


















Rebsie
Whooo, I've not heard you do anything like this before ... I never cease
to be amazed at what a versatile musician you are.
Dom is indeed insanely talented. The Viv Stanshall of our age.
Caroline's vocal is beautifully warm and resonant. Just the ticket.
Brilliant!