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Security Guard


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The best comment I've got on this song was from a guy who I gather had just gotten out of prison. He was standing near the stage at an open mic in Downtown KCMO, watching me while I performed the song. When I was done he looked at me and said " You know, that songs funny, but it ain't ".
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Lyrics

I'm Fifty and Fat and I work in a Security Job

No Bennies, Low Wages I feel like such a Slob.

When the Economy Bounces Back

I'll get my finances back on track

I'm Fifty and Fat and I work in a Security Job.


[v2]

I'm Forty-Six and I work as a Security Guard.

I've got Scrap Metal Sculptures all over my Mothers Yard.

Someday as an Artist I'll be Famous

Most Likely that will be Posthumous

I'm Forty-Six and I work as a Security Guard.

[V3]

I'm Thirty-Nine and I Supervise Security Guards

I Sit at my Desk my Ass is Turning to Lard

I Monitor the Monitors Hour by Hour

Basking in my Enormous Power

I'm Thirty-Nine and I Supervise Security Guards

---
[v4]

I'm Twenty-Six I work in Security

I have a Tenuous Grip on Reality

Some Day when I've Totally Lost my Mind

I'll Be on the Corner with a Cardboard Sign

I'm Twenty-Six and I work in Security.

[v5]

I'm Nineteen Like my Security job is Cool.

Like it Fits my Schedule like when I'm Going to Like School

Like When I get my like Masters degree

Like in Like Etruscan Pottery

Like then I'll be like Quitting my Security Job.

[v6]

I'm Sixty-Five and I work as a Rent-a-Cop

My Retirement plan turned out to be a Total Flop

My 401ks gone down the tubes

I Guess this is what Ill Have to do

I'm Sixty-Five and I work as a Rent-a-Cop

Repeat Verse 1

Words and Music c. 2010 David Damroze
Song Stats
Hits: 2066
Comments: 8
Fans: 4
Plays: 127
Downloads: 60
Votes: 0
Uploaded: Feb 21, 2010 - 11:33:23 AM
Last Updated: Mar 07, 2013 - 09:13:43 AM Last Played: Mar 27, 2017 - 02:13:10 AM
Song License
Creative Commons License:
Attribution-NoDerivs-NonCommercial

Creative Commons

Song Actions
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Hardware:
RS Mic. Old Harmony Classic Guitar
Software:
GB
Comments
angelahope said 2801 days ago (February 21st, 2010)
LOL
I absolutely love this! LMAO!
Check out my latest song called Love Is In Motion (feat. Grand Daddy Mack)
Damroze said 2800 days ago (February 22nd, 2010)
Thank You Angela..
I always like the sound of a womans laughter... except for that time on my honeymoon...
Check out my latest song called Somewhere Between Atchison and Oskaloosa
Moviz said 2800 days ago (February 22nd, 2010)
Well I didn't
expect this style from you David, but it was very pleasant and funny listening.... nice pickin' there too, regards M
Check out my latest song called Angels
Damroze said 2800 days ago (February 22nd, 2010)
I'm almost..
as versatile as you, Mo :-)
Check out my latest song called Somewhere Between Atchison and Oskaloosa
spitlogic said 2800 days ago (February 22nd, 2010)
Hehe
Funny track. Thanks for sharing.
Check out my latest song called Represent
richard13 said 2797 days ago (February 25th, 2010)
Too cool
I don't work in security but most of the rest sounds familiar. Even so, I had several good chuckles. Thanks.
Check out my latest song called one last night with you
Char said 2796 days ago (February 26th, 2010)
Well,
the most entertaining, albeit sobering, tale I've heard. And you have mastered your organ as well, may I assume? Excellent piece. Thank you, long lost friend.
Check out my latest song called Bound, v2. w Music by Dirigent
PaulaMunk said 2735 days ago (April 28th, 2010)
Lots
of smiles. Nice to hear you're making the most of your talent for satire and commentary. Great singing. :)
Check out my latest song called O, Shenandoah
Artist Info
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Name: David Damroze
Location: Kansas City MO United States
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Song Whittler. Rights reserved for original material. Damroze@yahoo.com Collaborations : Time Clicks Away w/Char ( Open collab) Memories of Rose w/ Moviz -53273 Champagne cinderella w/ Moviz -74882 I hunger for the Thorn w/... [see more]

Check out some of my other songs:

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