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Secrets


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Description
I recently had surgery, so I've been spending a fair bit of time recuperating at home. My first few days back at home were a bit of a daze, as I was kept heavily sedated on pain killers. I never seemed to sleep during that time, but rather just faded in and out of reality.

During those first few days in which sleep was so elusive, I would occasionally stumble out the back door in the middle of the night and sit in my adirondack chair on the deck. The clear sky was big and full of stars, and I spent time listening to the frogs by the creek that runs through our property, stargazing, and just thinking.

During one of those first nights I was in a lot of pain, so I quietly got up, took some meds, and stumbled out to the frogs and stars. As I sat there, my fingers found the nearby wind chime and began fumbling across the small tubes. Looking down, I noticed my meditation bell, so I began to gently strike it a few times.

After a while of doing this, a gentle hum began to vibrate in my body, and I noticed that my senses were heightened: hearing, sight, smell, and touch. I could smell the water cascading down the creek; I could almost touch the cold night air; The chimes were still ringing, but their sound had changed in a way I cannot describe. The hum grew stronger, and as I leaned back in the chair as to try and absorb it, I looked up in the sky. The stars seemed to pulsate and change colors, almost as if they were conveying a message to me in some kind of cosmic code. I was completely immobile, yet I could feel everything: the hum, my breathing, the stars. Suddenly, a moment of crystal clarity presented itself in my body.

It was in that moment that the secrets of the universe began revealing themselves to me, one after the other. Truth after truth entered through my forehead and traveled down my spine, drenching me in a cosmic wave of revelation. Such clarity! Such simplicity! Such bliss! I felt as if I truly understood everything in that moment.

But alas, I began to realize that as each new secret presented itself to me, the previous one evaporated into the ether. They seemed to cycle through my body as if in a slow motion whirlpool, and I was powerless to stop the cycle. I desperately grasped at each secret--to somehow hold on to it and put it in a lockbox in my brain--but it was as if my being only had room for one secret at a time.

In the midst of this metaphysical experience I heard a faint giggling in my ear. I couldn't tell if the giggling was coming from my body or not, but I'm certain it wasn't me. Perhaps it was God, laughing at her cosmic joke being played out on an unsuspecting mortal, not unlike the jokes that have been played out on humanity for eons.

It was a cruel joke to be sure, as I have little recollection of the experience. I can't remember the secrets, but I can assure you that there are secrets, and there are answers to those cosmic, spiritual questions fermenting in each of us.

Perhaps it wasn't so cruel after all.
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Song Stats
Hits: 2713
Comments: 18
Fans: 15
Plays: 61
Downloads: 90

Uploaded: Mar 09, 2011 - 04:46:52 PM
Last Updated: Jul 03, 2013 - 01:20:47 PM Last Played: Mar 21, 2017 - 11:51:33 PM
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Comments
Ex_Silentio said 2447 days ago (March 10th, 2011)
Secrets
Patient and well thought out. The drone works well to underlie the whooshing in and out of the secrets. It lends an air of concentration and stillness. Wind chimes are always nice. The breathing and giggle/laugh sounds are subtle and effective. I really like this. And the writeup made for fascinating reading.
Check out my latest song called Speak Memory
mrattue said 2447 days ago (March 10th, 2011)
Sorry
to hear that you have been going through a rough time, though making such interesting music after what seems a pretty unique experience is a pretty major compensation?

As you say, at least you know that there are answers out there, that it is not all chaotic and pointless. That is worth a lot, even if you cannot remember it. And even if you could remember it, i doubt you could convey the substance of it in words. If it was a feeling rather than an objective, translatable communication, then is it any wonder that, like feelings in general, they were experienced and then went their way, replaced by other feelings?

Nice piece of music, too, especially with the comment to illuminate the meaning.

Cheers now


Marc
Check out my latest song called Second Wind
davisamerica said 2446 days ago (March 10th, 2011)
great write up
... we're all in search of the lost chord arn't we. nice track. be well.
Check out my latest song called ok char2(Vic and Flatrock mix)
egobandit said 2445 days ago (March 11th, 2011)
Your description
Had me, I know exactly what your talking about it happened to me also but I can t remember I like how the bass comes in this and the giggle is in my left ear powerful music sounds like a wave crashing or heavy breathing, this is a true piece of art! BTW I Hope the survey was minor be well!
Check out my latest song called rebuke the lie
Sigmund said 2443 days ago (March 13th, 2011)
Secrets
Excellent meditation and relaxation music. Sounds like you are recreating your experience from above. Thanks for sharing!
Sig
Check out my latest song called Running with the Wind by Peter B, feat rok41
RAVENS said 2443 days ago (March 13th, 2011)
Magic
The stars can be healing, especially when the fairies dance amongst them and make them shine. The universe emulates magic, especially when we most need it. I hope you are feeling better. This was so very pretty!

RAVEN ;-)
Check out my latest song called Tattooed Scars (w/ Sigmund, Scofugate, Rok41)
ktb said 2443 days ago (March 13th, 2011)
powerfully
hypnotic and completely beautiful. spellbound
Check out my latest song called Blackwater (by Tokai)
fasteddie said 2442 days ago (March 14th, 2011)
Interesting song
Cool ambient track.

It's cool the way the ominous tones take over.
The progressions cool.

Good stuff.


Check out my latest song called On Borrowed Time
racerat said 2441 days ago (March 15th, 2011)
Secrets
Not sure if the song is about the story or the story is about the song. But, you are right. There are secrets. They are indeed fleeting. But it is comforting to know they are out there, just out of a solid grasp. Drugs are like a hand that lifts a veil that we usually cannot see beyond. You had a lucky glimpse. What a gorgeous track.
RR
Check out my latest song called Paper Thin
KCsGROOVE said 2441 days ago (March 16th, 2011)
you describe
a kind of mystic experience...
You captured that vibe very well in this song!
Really cool!
KC
Check out my latest song called OUT OF MIND (3)
oldlibmike said 2434 days ago (March 22nd, 2011)
3 dimensional
I don't have surround but I swear I heard sounds behind me while listening :) Very well put together - evokes a mood.
Check out my latest song called Parabola
VicDiesel said 2431 days ago (March 26th, 2011)
secrets
A much more peaceful tune one would suspect from having been written in a pain attack.

Enjoyed.
Check out my latest song called Black Recorder
papag said 2430 days ago (March 27th, 2011)
big
awesome story CB. This track is quite nice too. It's the kind of piece that transcends a given and I wish it went on even longer.

thank you for the download :)
Check out my latest song called Chinese Flutes (first draft)
neilh79 said 2430 days ago (March 27th, 2011)
Secrets
Very powerful expression, the chimes are sublime enjoyed!
alackbass said 2430 days ago (March 27th, 2011)
Secrets
Wow! Can you get me some of those pain killers. The sound effects and musical elements you've combined here accurately match the experience you described. Well done!
Check out my latest song called Mean Miss Teacher
kingbee said 2430 days ago (March 27th, 2011)
pond life
Really relaxing..and interesting pice of music. I really got caught up in the visuals of it from your description. The birds are singing out side my window and they added to the outside wildlife sound of this. Good use of bass just dropping in now and again.
Hope you feel better and get some proper sleep.
cheers
Check out my latest song called No expense spared
dave_b said 2429 days ago (March 27th, 2011)
Secrets
Very peaceful & relaxing, good for meditation. That's quite a story... if it happened to me I'd be blaming the flashbacks :)
Check out my latest song called Llarions Blues
aRcTip said 2274 days ago (August 30th, 2011)
Secrets
Awesome!
Check out my latest song called A Ballad For The Fortunate
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Name: Jason
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Just an old punker trying to navigate his way through the world of MIDI, exploring new writing styles and making stuff up as I go along. My continuing mission: to explore all genres of music; to seek out strange sounds and messed up beats; to bol... [see more]

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Experimental music is any music that challenges the commonly accepted notions of what music is. There is an overlap with avant-garde music. John Cage was a pioneer in experimental music and defined and gave credibility to the form. As with other edge

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