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American Nights


by

efrost

 Genre: Rock
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Description
hey everyone, i am new here, this is my first song. any kind of feedback you have would be helpful.
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Lyrics
i'm haunted and i'm wanted by the ghost of sir thomas paine
we're all sitting stranded though we're branded as our hours of fame
the night is making noises, distant choices while i'm trying to sleep
the thunder shakes the windows makes the pillows on the bed seem cheap

we'll wake up and put on our disguise
we'll throw away our dreams and live in our lies
oh these american nights

the actor in his makeup starts to wakeup to a painted sky
the rain begins to fall as he crawls and we wonder why
i learned how to love from the hours watching mtv
it's always less amusing more confusing than the eye can see

we'll wake up and put on our disguise
we'll throw away our dreams and live in our lies
oh these american nights

i hear the women chatter bottles shatter my window view
they talk of wearing jewelry seeking beauty that they long outgrew
the clouds begin to shift their voices lift in the moon's white shine
all these visions of decisions have conquered my tired mind
Song Stats
Hits: 1263
Comments: 2
Fans: 0
Plays: 21
Downloads: 55
Votes: 0
Uploaded: Jul 03, 2009 - 07:45:32 PM
Last Updated: Jul 04, 2009 - 10:37:32 AM Last Played: Dec 10, 2018 - 09:38:29 AM
Song License
Creative Commons License:
NonCommercial-ShareAlike

Creative Commons

Song Actions
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Hardware:
macbook pro
Software:
logic express
Comments
Reggie_Pole said 3725 days ago (July 6th, 2009)
Good construction
and clever lyrics. The boldest choice was the whining, slightly discordant guitar in the background. That provides a stamp of uniqueness. Couple of suggestions: harmony vocal on the chorus, and a bit more dynamical variation. The step-up at 2:03 is a nice touch, just what's needed. Suggest keeping the dynamics high after that, instead of retreating back to the feel of the first two verses. One thing you might consider is beefing up the bass line from that point to give some more drive, and provide an evolution. The song could go out high, and I think that might give it a good effect. Might like a bit more separation in the mix, move the acoustic off-center to leave more room for the vocals. The volume mix is fine, but the spatial mix is a bit crowded. Anyway, nice work. Hope to hear more in the near future.
Check out my latest song called UnerSpizm
kingbee said 3724 days ago (July 7th, 2009)
Original
It might have been a good but run of the mill song without the ghost guitar going on which is a nice original touch.
I would maybe have bought the bass in a bit earlier as it felt a bit trebley till it came in.
I like the vox but as Reggie said it would be nice to either have harmonies or double track vox on the chorus.
It might be my ears but it felt like there was just a bit too much reverb on the whole mix and might give it a bit more 'space' with a bit of a clearer mix
But apart from that a really good song with good lyrics
Enjoyed it
cheers
Check out my latest song called No expense spared
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